By Nicole Lampert
|
'Letting go': Mariel Hemingway in London for the opening of a new play based on her grandfather's novel The Sun Also Rises
Mariel Hemingway used to be such a control freak that every minute of her life was regulated. Play with her daughters was limited to 15 minutes before she moved on to the next task: 30 minutes’ meditation or 20 minutes preparing meals, which were carefully weighed and assessed for fat content.
So it is a surprise that Mariel, who was nominated for an Oscar for her role in Woody Allen’s film Manhattan, is late for our meeting at the central London hotel where she is staying. She has mixed up her timings and was busy in the gym and having her obligatory cold shower when she realised she was late.
She is apologetic but laughs - because this is the new Mariel. Letting go has become her maxim and she credits it with finally allowing her to escape from what she describes as ‘the Hemingway curse’.
It’s quite a curse.
Her grandfather Ernest Hemingway may be regar ded as one of the seminal writers of the 20th century, but his legend also lives on through his image as an inveterate drinker. A trip to his grave will always be paved with fans’ empty bottles of Jack Daniels and wine.
But his drinking masked his manic depression; he ended his own life by shooting himself in the head 52 years ago.
Throughout the generations suicide has been the final ending for many Hemingways. Ernest’s father and two siblings killed themselves. And 15 years ago, on the anniversary of Ernest’s death, Mariel’s older sister Margaux, who was once the world’s highest-paid model, took an overdose which ended her own life.
Mariel’s other big sister Joan â€" known as ‘Muffet’ â€" is, meanwhile, a shell of her former self and needs constant care for bipolar disease.
'I've been depressed most of my life. It was like having a low-grade infection'
ÂIt is no wonder that Mariel’s new documentary, which recently premiered at the Sundance Festival, is called Running From Crazy. ‘I’ve been running from crazy all my life,’ says the 51-year-old. ‘But it is only in the last few years that I have started to believe I could break that cursed chain. For the first time in my life I’m not worried.’
It’s a bold statement for a woman who, despite being a mother of two, admits she once contemplated suicide herself. ‘I’ve been depressed most of my life,’ she says. ‘It was like having a low-grade infection. I was always a little bit sad.
‘But things really took a turn for the worse when my husband [film maker Stephen Crisman] was diagnosed with cancer in 1999,’ she recalls. ‘It brought up all these memories of having to care for my mother who had cancer for a good part of my childhood. But it was only when he went into remission that I went into a dark depression.
'Cursed chain': Mariel with, from left, sisters Muffet and Margaux - once the world's highest paid model - and their father Jack
‘It set me off and lasted several months. I began to think my family would probably be better off without me. The thing I really understand about suicide is that people call it a selfish act, but when you are that ill you are thinking the world is better off without you.
‘You think your children are better off; you are actually doing them a service. I understand how people get to that stage.’
Part of the Hemingway curse is a predisposition for mental illness. That comes hand in hand with an addictive nature. Ernest’s addiction, famously, was his love of alcohol and danger.
Mariel is in London to attend the opening night of new play Fiesta, based on her grandfather’s semi-autobiographical novel The Sun Also Rises. The play - like the book - is an orgy of drinking set against the backdrop of the famous Pamplona Fiesta in Spain.
When we meet again at t he after-show party, Mariel - glass of water firmly in hand - says she loved the play but after seeing all the drinking (the cast end up with red wine all over their clothes) she is reminded about ‘just how f***ed up my family was’.
Seminal writer: Mariel's father Jack had a strange relationship with his own father, Ernest Hemingway (pictured), says the actress
Her father Jack was Ernest’s only son from his marriage to Hadley Richardson, the first of his four wives. He had a strange relationship with his father.
'[My father] wasn't a monster. But he did drink too much... and I think things happened'
‘Ernest’s school of parenting was to take my father to a whorehouse when he was 13,’ says Mariel. ‘He would also take him fishing but never let him fish â€" my dad had to watch.’
Jack, a writer, expert fisherman and river conservationist, who died of heart problems in 2000, was an alcoholic. Mariel’s mother Byra probably was too. Mariel has strong memories of daily ‘wine time’ which started at 5pm and continued until the married couple fought and one ended up throwing a bottle at the other. It would be left to Mariel to clear the blood away.
Mariel blames her father’s drinking on the most startling of the revelations contained in her documentary. In it, she says she believes her father sexually molested her two sisters.
She thinks she was only saved from his clutches because from the age of 11, when her mother contracted cancer, she slept with Byra until she left home at 1 7. But she says her knowledge of it put her off sex for years.
Plaudits: Mariel starring in a scene from the 1983 film Star 80
‘That is the hardest part of this film for me to talk about,’ she sighs when I ask her about her shocking allegation. ‘I loved my dad and he was a wonderful man. He was so kind and I learned a lot from him. He wasn’t a monster.
‘But he did drink too much, especially when I was very young, and I think things happened. I don’t think it was regular and it is something I have more of a visceral memory of rather than a visual one. I think if he was alive now he probably wouldn’t even remember it.
‘I am not condoning it or making excuses for it. But things happen in families and there is unspoken stuff. That doesn’t make it right but it also doesn’t make a person evil, and my dad wasn’t evil.’
Each of the Hemingway girls, Mariel acknowledges, had their own madnesses. Muffet was ‘legitimately crazy’. She would go for naked walks in deep winter and although she was a talen ted artist who studied in France, Jack would regularly have to fetch her back to their countryside home in Idaho when she had a ‘mad episode’.
Mariel believes that her sister’s experiments with drugs, LSD in particular, means that ‘now she really has a lot of problems’.
Margaux was different. For most of her life Mariel was convinced her sister chose to be mad â€" but having discovered incredible unseen footage of Margaux for her documentary, she has been forced to change her mind.
‘Margaux started drinking when she was 15,’ recalls Mariel. ‘When I was little she would vanish and my dad would go looking for her and find her in a bar drinking shots of tequila in the town nearest to our house. She was hardcore.’ She also suffered from bulimia from a young age.
Margaux moved to New York when she was 16 to work as a PR for motor cycle daredevil Evel Knie vel, but was quickly scouted as a model. With her gorgeous, blonde, all-American looks and legendary surname, within a year she had become the first model to win a $ 1?million contract, working with Faberge perfumes.
Her pictures graced billboards worldwide, she was a frequent Vogue cover girl and the world was so fascinated by her she was the first model to appear on the cover of Time magazine.
'I always thought Margaux should have been able to control her life, but... I realise that she was a train wreck'Â
Part of the infamous Studio 54 crowd, she started experimenting with drugs, as well as drinking heavily. To most of the world she had it all; while her little sister could see her falling apart at the seams.
‘I always thought Margaux should have been able to control her life, but when I see the footage, I realise that she was a train wreck. The idea that I might end up like her always scared the living daylights out of me.’
The sisters’ relationship was never close but it underwent tremendous damage when Margaux introduced Mariel to her world. Margaux won a role in the thriller film Lipstick in 1976 and when she was told there was a part for a younger sister she asked that her own sister be allowed to do it.
So it was a massive blow when Margaux â€" who always wanted to be a movie star â€" was criticised for her acting while Mariel was nominated for a Golden Globe.
< span>Margaux went on to make a string of unmemorable flops; Mariel moved on to Woody Allen and plaudits.
Massive blow: Mariel's (pictured in Cannes in 1979) success eclipsed that of Margaux when she followed her sister into an acting career
When Margaux ended her life aged just 42 with an overdose of barbiturates in her LA studio apartment, she didn’t even leave a note. ‘That made me feel so bad because she obviously thought no one cared,’ says Mariel. ‘But it didn’t surprise me that she died on the same day as my grandfather â€" she was following his path and the way he lived his life.’
Having seen so much alcoholism, Mariel determined she would not go that way. Instead she became obsessive about her health; which led her down some pretty extreme paths.
‘I have done the weirdest things under the guise of being healthy,’ she says. ‘But my addictive nature came through. There was one year that I had almost nothing but massive amounts of coffee; I didn’t eat but I thought it would be ok because the organic coffee was good for me. It was insane.
‘I had another year where I ate no fat at all; my skin sta rted to crack it was so dry. I had huge control elements over food; it was a type of eating disorder and I would think about food all the time.’
She realised things had to change as she watched her own girls, from her marriage to Stephen, grow up, and became particularly concerned that they too would inherit the Hemingway curse.
‘My kids had a happy childhood but when I would watch them play I admit that sometimes I was jealous,’ she says shaking her head. ‘I know it’s a tough admission for a mother, but it made me realise I had never played in my childhood and I didn’t know how to play with them.
‘My way of coping had always been to be in total control of every element of my life. Even as I tried to play with them I would be looking at my watch thinking 15 minutes and then we move on to something else. Play shouldn’t be timed!’
Daughter: Mariel's daughter Dree Hemingway is a model
Over the years Mariel has seen ‘every guru and woo woo’ under the sun in a bid to cure herself. She became a yoga addict, met the Dalai Lama (‘I’m sure he thought I was an idiot’) but says it is only in the past few years she has realised that her happiness can only come from within â€" not through someone else.
‘I took a little bit from everything I tried but the only person who could cure me was me,’ she explains.
Her marriage did not last â€" she split from Stephen amicably five years ago â€" and for the past two years she has been dating exuberant Hollywood stuntman Bobby Williams who has given her a new lease of life.
He forces her â€" literally â€" to climb mountains and perform somersaults on trampolines, and her eyes glow with happiness when he walks into the room where we are talking.
‘He taught me how to play,’ says the still beautiful ac tress. ‘I laugh with him and I never even thought laughter could exist in my life. My girls tell me, “We don’t even know who you are any more, but we like youâ€. I have learned how to have fun.’
The couple have a book out next month called The Willing Way, with ideas of how to improve your life.
Making the documentary has also been an important part of what she hopes is closure of the Hemingway curse. ‘I have shown my girls they are likely to have a predisposition to depression, but if they are mindful â€" watch out how they eat, watch what they drink â€" then they can still be ok.’
Her daughter Dree, 25, is a model while Langley, 23, is an artist. Both have taken the Hemingway name. ‘They’re not stupid!’ laughs Mariel. ‘They know being a Hemingway can be a help as well as a curse.’
The girls never knew Mariel’s mother, who died in 1989 of cancer, an d she sees the documentary as way of introducing them to their crazy family. ‘I cry every time I see it but I hope the takeaway is positive,’ insists Mariel. ‘There has been so much suffering, but that is gone now.’Â
- FIESTA (The Sun Also Rises) is at the Trafalgar Studio 2 until March 2. Box office: 0844 871 7632, atgtickets.com/fiesta. Running From Crazy will be out later this year.
No comments:
Post a Comment