Con dine with me! The supermarket ready meals that'll fool your guests into thinking they're homemade

Con dine with me! The supermarket ready meals that'll fool your guests into thinking they're homemade

By Anne Shooter

PUBLISHED: 21:18 EST, 8 March 2013 | UPDATED: 14:26 EST, 11 March 2013

We all succumb to ready meals occasionally â€" but most would draw the line at serving them at dinner parties. Now etiquette expert Debrett’s says this is acceptable, as long as we put the food on posh plates and admit it’s not homemade. But is it possible to pull the wool over guests’ eyes?

ANNE SHOOTER challenged friends to tell the difference between homemade dishes and supermarket ‘fakeaways’.

The truth? Everything was a ready meal â€" with Anne using clever tricks to make them look even more convincing.

Keeping the secret: Anne Shooter lifts the lid on those 'fakeaway' items that will fool even the wiliest dinner guests

Ready meal: The Sainsbury's meals are pictured

SAINSBURY'S

Starter

Taste the Difference smoked salmon pate, £1.55, 115g

The pate is delicious, smooth and smokey with a few larger pieces of salmon so it doesn’t have that supermarket factory-made feel. I put this into a mini Kilner jar for each guest and serve with oatcakes and a sliver of lemon. Not one of my guests thinks it is shop-bought, and every plate is cleared.

FAKE FACTOR: 5/5

Main Course

Taste the Difference bistro chargrilled king prawn and chicken paella, £7, 800g

I have high hopes for this â€" it looks authentic, with grill marks on the prawns and the chorizo slices curling at the edges, and I put it in a terracotta dish after microwaving it. But my guests are suspicious, saying it’s not up to my usual standards. They declare the rice ‘sludgy’ and the paella und er-seasoned. 

FAKE FACTOR: 1/5

Side Dish

Ready to roast Mediterranean vegetables, £2, 400g

Everyone agrees this selection of vegetables drizzled with olive oil is dull and uninspiring. One guest says he hopes I haven’t made them. 

FAKE FACTOR: 2/5

Dessert

Blood orange creme brulee, £3.50 for two

This is easy to fake! The brulees come in cute little china pots, along with a sachet of sugar. But rather than using that, I make a show of sprinkling sugar from my sugarbowl, then get busy with the blow torch in full view of my guests. Delicious, and everyone thinks I’ve made them.

FAKE FACTOR: 5/5
COST PER HEAD: £7
TOTAL: 13/20

MARKS & SPENCER

Starter

Gastropub runny poache d scotch eggs, £3.49 for two

Scotch eggs are super trendy, but a faff to make. You heat these for 12 minutes and then cut them in half and the yolks are bright yellow and soft, oozing out over the sausagemeat. Genius. And once I’ve served them on a wooden board with pickled cucumbers, nobody dreams they are shop-bought.

FAKE FACTOR: 5/5

Main Course

Cook menu individual beef wellingtons, £12.99 for two

These look homemade. When guests arrive, I make a show of brushing them with beaten egg or milk before popping them in the oven. The result? Delicious buttery puff pastry encasing beef fillet, chicken liver and mushroom pate. All my guests are conned. 

FAKE FACTOR: 5/5

Side Dish

Carrot and swede crush, £2, 300g
Heavenly! Nobody would imagine it had not been mashed by hand at home w ith lots of love.

FAKE FACTOR: 5/5 

Dessert

Raspberry pannacotta, £3.29 for two

I have to cheat with this because it comes in plastic glasses. I transfer them into dessert wine glasses â€" and it pays off! Nobody suspects I haven’t made them. The pannacotta is soft and creamy and has an authentic feel to it.

FAKE FACTOR: 4/5

COST PER HEAD: £10.88
TOTAL: 19/20

TESCO

Starter
Finest restaurant collection coquille of shellfish, £5 for two

These are easy to heat on a baking tray and the combination of langoustine tails and scallops in creamy sauce, topped with mash, cheese and breadcrumbs is divine. Nobody thinks I’ve made them, but I do get asked if I have bought them from a restaurant, so they get points for fabulousness.

This image shows the Tesco ready meals

FAKE FACTOR: 4/5

Main Course

Slow-cooked lamb shanks with roasted vegetables, £10 for two

I transfer these into my own casserole dish and serve it at the table â€" very Jamie Oliver. In fact, one of my guests claims to recognise this dish from one of his recipe books! Beautifully soft with a rich gravy. Nobody guessed it was bought.

Fake Factor 5/5

Side Dish

Creamy mash with truffle flavoured oil, £3 for 500g

This mash is super-decadent, made with cream, butter and truffle oil. You’d have to really know what you were doing to make mash this silky-smooth â€" but my friends are convinced I’ve made it because ‘supermarkets don’t put truffles in mash’. Wrong! But I had to add some desperately-needed salt.
FAKE FACTOR: 4/5

Dessert

Timperley rhubarb and orange sp onge puddings, £3 for two

I serve these with custard and thought my guests would instantly know they were shop-bought. Not because of the ping of the microwave, but because the  topping is like a proper, thick compote, which didn’t taste homemade to me. But my friends assume I’ve used rhubarb jam and are very impressed with my cute little puds. I’m almost proud!

FAKE FACTOR: 4/5
COST PER HEAD: £10.50
Total: 17/20
 
WAITROSE

Starter
Smoked salmon terrine slices,  £3.99 for 160g

When I put these on the table  on wooden boards with lemon  and crackers, there is a  communal shriek of ‘supermarket!’ from my guests. They taste  good, with a creamy middle and smoked salmon on the outside,  but there is no fooling anyone I have made them. They just look  too good!

FAKE FACTOR: 2/ 5

Main Course

Easy to cook roast pork with parsnip crust and sage butter, £5.99 for 560g

This was indeed easy to cook â€" and tastes fine. But two guests realise it isn’t homemade. They  say the parsnip cubes in the  crust are too evenly cut and have a slight ‘chewiness.’ Others are  not sure.

Conclusion: The Waitrose ready meal scored 13/20

FAKE FACTOR: 2/5

Side Dish

Spinach mornay, £1.99 for 250g 

This is lovely â€" spinach in a rich, creamy sauce which goes very well with the pork. I find the sludgy colour slightly off-putting. My guests don’t seem to mind though, and polish off the lot, convinced it is homemade. Not bad for three minutes in a microwave!

FAKE FACTOR: 4/5

Dessert

Seriously chocolate melt in the middle puddings, £2.70 for two

I like these a lot! They are impressive and need just a  minute each in the microwave. Plus they release easily from  their plastic pots on to my  plates. Nobody guesses I have not made them and there are plenty of ‘oohs’ as they dig in their spoons and watch the runny chocolate sauce in  the middle ooze out. Rich  and indulgent. 

FAKE FACTOR: 5/5

COST PER HEAD: £7.34
TOTAL: 13/20

MORRISONS

Starter
Carrot and coriander soup, £1.50 for 500g

Everyone declares this is ‘definitely homemade’. I am sure it is the attention to detail that does it â€" little pieces of chunky carrot and the coriander seeds, as well as leaf coriander, make it seem more ‘loved’ than most supermarket soups. All good.

FAKE FACTOR: 5/5

Main Course

Beef rib in stout and pepper gravy, £4 each or two for £7

There is no doubt in any of my guests’ minds that this is homemade â€" and I can’t blame them. It has no nasties in it whatsoever, just natural ingredients. By the time I have served it from my casserole dish, it is falling from the bone and looks like it has been in the oven all day, rather than just 40 minutes. Sublime.
FAKE FACTOR: 5/5

Side

Petit pois, leek and pancetta
This is pleasant enough to eat but looks shop-bought. According to my guests, it is the colour of the vegetables, which look overcooked, and the ‘gloopy’ sauce which give it away. For me, the dried mint is a deal breaker.

FAKE FACTOR: 2/5

Dessert
M bistro sticky toffee pudding, £2.99 for 400g

This looks so false when I turn it out of its plastic dish after microwaving it that I decide to serve it in individual bowls, convinced my guests will still know I haven’t made it. But I’m wrong! It turns out to be a really good old-fashioned pud. Yummy.

FAKE FACTOR: 5/5
COST PER HEAD: £6
TOTAL: 17/20

CONCLUSION
M&S is the king of the ready meal â€"no surprise there. But if you look carefully, there are all sor ts of products â€" from various supermarkets and in different price ranges â€" that are good enough to pass off as homemade. Now you’ve had permission from Debrett’s, why not cheat?